Thoughtful Thursday: Look for the signs.

I read a blog post that was shared on a friend's blog. (Thank you Stacy!) Honestly, it was one of those life-changing stories that will forever alter the way I see people. It's something that I've thought about before, but this post expressed the raw, intense honesty that we sometimes need to feel and need others to feel towards us. It took me back to an experience that I had almost 4 years ago.

Mr. Whitty was injured in an ATV accident. He suffered a compression fracture in the vertebra of his back. He was literally millimeters away from paralysis. His three days in the neurological unit at St. Joseph's Hospital were physically and emotionally overwhelming for both of us. On the day that he was to come home, we both received training from the hospital's occupational therapists. They told us how he would need to walk, sit, stand, lay, shower, go to the bathroom, and get dressed for the next several months of recovery. I knew that I would be his caregiver through much of this process. The long drive home in rush hour traffic was excruciating for him. There was no way to sit comfortably in the car and the narcotics that he was taking made him extra sensitive to light and sound. We arrived home to our four children who were excited to see their dad but could not hug him and had to try to be quiet. I got him settled in bed, fed my children something for dinner and told them that I had to go to the pharmacy to get his medications. I will never forget walking through the aisles of Walgreens, passing by other customers, and finding it odd that none of them knew that I was having the worst day of my life. It was literally my worst day and no one knew it. I think if someone would have started talking to me I would have burst into tears right there.

I think about that night in Walgreens often. I look at others and can't help but wonder if they are having their worst day. And I find that it helps me to be more understanding. More patient. More forgiving. The blog post linked below talks about signs. The signs that we wish we could wear to let people know to be patient with us. To be gentle with us. Cause we're having our worst day. I imagine myself walking through Walgreens wearing a sign that read: "My husband was seriously injured and is facing months of recovery and I'm facing caring for him and our house and our new business and our four children and I'm a little overwhelmed right now." I bet one of those customers would have smiled at me. Or held the door for me. It makes me wonder. It  makes me wonder what would happen if I smiled more. Or held the door for someone else. Because even though we can't see them, some days, we all wear a sign.

We Must See Past What it Seems...
http://bravegirlsclub.com/archives/2151

Wednesday: What's Been Happening?

PK decided it was time for him to start wearing a suit to church, since he would be blessing the sacrament and wanted to look his best. (And his mother had a little to do with that decision as well.) It was a picture moment  because this was the first Sunday with all of my guys in a suit. Have you ever seen a more handsome group?

PK asked a friend to go to the Homecoming dance with him. We had to think of a clever way to ask her. Thankfully, unlike my high school days, we could look up some creative ideas on the Internet. One more reason to love the Internet! We took a plain white t-shirt and he wrote his name on the front with a permanent fabric marker. Then he took washable markers and wrote the names of a bunch of other guys. When she put the shirt through the wash, his name was the only one left on the shirt. Great, fun, easy, cheap idea. He dropped it on her doorstep and ran away. She answered YES that same evening. So here we go into the exciting world of school dances. (And, as he is quickly figuring out, the EXPENSIVE world of school dances!)

We did a pretty good job with Crazy Hair Day this year. Here's Miss A and Mr. E in all of their crazy hair glory. Miss A decided to call her style "Scorpia".

Random kids' quotes from this week:

Miss A: (speaking about the For Strength of Youth book) "This is a really good book! Have you read this? There's a lot of great stuff in here!"

PK: "Corn is vegetable candy."

PC: (speaking to Miss A) "Wait, you're in FIFTH grade?" Miss A: "Yah, let me introduce myself. I'm your sister and I've been in fifth grade for a month now."

PK: "Here, I'll make the fan oscillate. I'm using my big words."

PK: "Mom, when you're making dinners and stuff. do you think you could start making....ummm...more? Cause I need more food." (He really does.)

Tuesday's Terrific Tip: Treats!

I've been doing pretty well with making healthier eating choices.  I'm not a dieter. Just can't do it. Period. But I've been making little changes. And I'm starting to see results! Here are a couple of better snack choices that I've discovered along the way. I love them!

These are so yummy when you want something sweet. They're baked, not fried and have no transfat. 

My kids know that if they see this in the fridge they may lose a finger if they touch it. (Just kidding. But really, they better not touch it!) My favorite thing about this drink is that it has no artificial sweeteners. I've been trying to keep those out of our diet. They have lots of flavors, my favorite is squeezed lemonade.

Monday's Memory: Kindergarten Class of '78

I posted kindergarten pictures of my own kids a few weeks ago. So it's only fair that I should post my own kindergarten picture. Mrs. Dysart's class at Cholla School, 1977-1978. Check out the clothes on these kids!

Thoughtful Thursday

I am a Scout mom. I am a Scout wife. I have a Scout calling. I wear a brown shirt. It has patches on it. I go to Scout meetings. I go to Roundtable. (Not always with a happy face, but I still go.) I did not plan on being one of those "Scout people." I grew up with girls. When our only brother was old enough to participate in Scouts, I was married and out of the house. As a young mother, the thought of a Cub Scout calling terrified me. And the notion that I would someday work with the Boy Scouts was inconceivable. But I married a Scout guy. And I had three boys. My fate was sealed. I knew from the moment they placed that first baby boy in my arms that Scouts would be a part of my life. It was only a matter of time. And let me be the first to say that I love it. And this is why.

My boys are growing into fairly fine men, thanks in part, to the principles taught in Scouts. Last Sunday, a member of our ward bore his testimony of the Scouting program. He said that during a lesson in the Deacons quorum (12-13 year old boys) the boys were asked to identify the qualities that they would value in a future wife. Now if you've spent any time with 12 and 13 year old boys, you know that this is the type of question that results in a lot of goofy posture, goofy looks, and goofy comments. But amidst the goofiness, the qualities that they listed were these: someone who is trustworthy, someone who is loyal, helpful, courteous, kind, cheerful, reverent...you get the idea. Because this is the law that they recite each time they go to a Scout meeting.

A Scout is:

Trustworthy,

Loyal,

Helpful,

Friendly,

Courteous,

Kind,

Obedient,

Cheerful,

Thrifty,

Brave,

Clean,

Reverent

That is what I love about Scouting. Those are the qualities that I want my boys to value in themselves and others. That is why I wear the brown shirt, and even tuck it in.

Wednesday: What's Been Happening?

August is a busy month at our house. Which is kind of funny because on a traditional calendar, August seems like such a non-eventful month. No major holidays to speak of. Not even a traiditonal "August symbol" like a heart for February and a shamrock for March. Poor August!

But in Arizona, August means the start of a new school year. And at the Whitty house, there are 2 birthdays. My preschool also starts in August. Here are a few pictures from our August events.

Happy Birthday to Mr. E!!   Seven years old!

All ready for preschool to start. Don't these picture of fresh school supplies just make you giddy?

Or is that just me?

Happy Birthday to PK!! He chose Texas Road House for his birthday dinner. He DID NOT choose to sit on the saddle while everyone sang to him. But he was a good sport anyway!

Tuesday's Terrific Tip

I have been doing a pretty good job so far this school year with cooking breakfast. It's not something I've always done but this year it's working out and I'm loving it! I found a GREAT recipe for whole wheat pancake mix here. The pancakes are healthy and hearty and you can enjoy the convenience of a mix for a fraction of the cost. (Sounds like I just wrote a pancake commercial!) I tweaked the recipe a little bit and still had good results. I don't always have buttermilk on hand, and sometimes would rather use skim milk anyway. My favorite is to add fresh blueberries. I make the mix and store it in the pantry. We get about 3 big batches of pancakes from 1 recipe of the mix. The recipe below is my "tweaked" version. Click the blue link above for the original at The Sisters Cafe. Enjoy!






Whole-Wheat Oatmeal Pancake Mix
(This will make 10 cups of dry mix.)


3 1/2 cups quick oats

4 cups whole wheat flour

1 cups all-purpose flour

3 tablespoons sugar

3 tablespoons baking powder

1 tablespoon salt

1 tablespoon baking soda

1 cup vegetable oil


Mix all the dry ingredients together in a mixer fitted with a paddle or you can do it by hand. With mixer on slow speed (or gently by hand), drizzle the vegetable oil into the bowl slowly while the mixer is running. When all the oil has been added, stop the mixer and squeeze a clump of mix in your hand. If it stays together, it is just right. If it is still crumbly, add another tablespoon of oil at a time until the consistency is correct). Store in an airtight container for up to two weeks at room temperature or indefinitely in the refrigerator or freezer.

To make 12-15 pancakes: whisk together 2 1/2 cups mix, 2 cups milk, and 2 eggs. The mixture may seem thin at first but the oats will soak up the milk as it stands while the griddle preheats. (Sometimes I need to add about a 1/2 cup more of the mix.) Heat a griddle and drop the batter onto it. When the edges look dry and bubbles come to the surface and don’t break, turn the pancake over to finish cooking on the second side.

Monday's Memory

Labor day is an interesting holiday. Maybe I just don't get it, but it's never meant anything more than a long weekend. When I was little, it meant the Jerry Lewis MDA telethon. My mom would let me have a friend sleepover the Sunday night before Labor Day and we would watch the telethon. Not only would we watch as much as we could before we fell asleep, we were on a mission to write down all of the phone numbers that were on the bottom of the television screen. Back in the day, you could call in and make donations. But you had to call the local number for your city or state. (I can't remember which.) So we would sit and try to write all of the numbers down. Why? I have absolutely no idea. It seemed like a good way for a couple of nine-year-old girls to spend some time in front of the TV. This year, Jerry Lewis wasn't even hosting the telethon. And I'm sure there is a national call center to accept donations. And I'm sure that you can donate online as well. And there are certainly more entertainment options for nine-year-old girls at a sleepover. Funny, my kids don't even get to have sleepovers. My, how times have changed!

Five for Friday

Here are five things that I love to hear
(aside from the obvious...a newborn's cry, the ocean, birds singing, etc.)

1. The sound of the vacuum going somewhere in the house by anyone other than myself
2. My children yelling, "MOOOOOMMMMM!" immediately followed by "Never mind."
3. The sound of the door to the garage opening followed by the sound of keys put down on the counter. It means that Mr. Whitty is home from work. (We do have a place to hang keys but I actually asked him to put his keys down on the counter first because I love the sound!)
4. The weather guy saying the words  "cooling trend"
5. The sound of my children practicing their instruments. Other than the piano, we have a trumpet and a cello. It's pretty amazing to hear them making music with instruments that I have no idea how to play.

What sounds do you love to hear?

Wednesday: What's Been Happening?

We spent the Fourth of July weekend in Eagar, AZ with our Whitty grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. It's always so much fun to experience this holiday in a small town. This year the feeling was extra special because everyone was so grateful that the town's structures had been spared from the Wallow fire a few weeks earlier. Favorite activities were the parade, and incredible bbq (I did the cooking this year :) ) the amazing fireworks show and swimming in the lake. Miss A had a fancy tea party with her girl cousins. The boys constructed and RC car race track in the field next to the house, complete with moguls and a jump.

My incredibly and independently creative daughter made patriotic shirts and fabric hair flowers for all of the girls.

But for the boys, the highlight of the trip was pig butchering. Some family members up there had been raising pigs and they butchered them that weekend. My boys were in hog heaven. (Yes, pun intended!) I don't think we could have planned a better vacation for them. For my three boys, getting to help butcher the pigs was probably better than Disneyland.

And me? I spent a lot of time on this hammock with this view. What you don't see in the picture was the book that was in my hands the entire time I was on the hammock. Heaven!!

Tuesday's Terrific Tip

Here's one more reason to love your crock pot. Baked potatoes! I "baked" them in my crock pot last night and they tasted just like they came from the oven. No need to heat up the house.

Wash potatoes and prick with a fork. Wrap in foil. Put them in the crock pot and slow cook on high for 5-6 hours.

Five for Friday

Cooler weather is coming....cooler weather is coming....cooler weather is coming. If I keep saying it, maybe it will happen. I don't complain about the heat too much. I actually prefer it to frigid temperatures and snow.

But there are some things that I won't miss once cooler weather returns.

1. Brushing my teeth in warm water because that's all that's coming out of the tap.
2. Opening the door to a public building and feeling like I need to use my shirt as a potholder.
3. Avoiding the BBQ. You know it's hot when it is to hot to stand next to it and cook something.
4. Everyone being holed up in the house because it's too hot to play outside. There is no good way to burn off some energy in here.
5. The breeze that feels like a hairdryer blowing in my face.

Thoughtful Thursday

Keep calm and carry on. I've seen this thought posted around a lot these days. I love it. It's true that sometimes, keeping calm and carrying on is about all you can do. But I ran across these other thoughts. And while they may not be as inspirational, they are, in their own way, still a little true.

Wednesday: What's Happening?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MR.E!

I knew from the moment of your crazy, speedy, emergency birth that we would need to buckle up and enjoy the ride. So far, I've been right. But it's a ride I'm happy to be on and I wouldn't trade it for anything!

Thank you for making me smile everyday.

Tuesday's Terrific Tip

This sounds a little sappy, but trust me, it helps. Find a picture of your kids that you love. (Yes, the kids that you love and a picture that you love. I need to work on my grammar!) Put that picture in a cute frame and place it in your kitchen. Then when you are slaving away cooking dinner you can glance over at that picture and remember who you are cooking for. It really works.

I remember reading this once, and it has stuck with me. "The fact that I have to cook each day suggests that we live in a time and place where food is abundant. If I have to plan meals, all that means is that we have a wide spectrum of possibilies to choose from. I get to exercise judgement and creativity on a daily basis in an activity that helps build unity, comfort and physical strenght to my family...Because each member of my family needs to eat, I have the opportunity as the cook to make a meaningful connection with each of them every single day. Remember, everything you have to do means you belong to someone."
(Being The Mom  by Emily Watts)

So enjoy being the cook! And find a way to remind yourself of the little and big people that you get to nourish every day.

Monday's Memory

We were headed to the beach. It was almost Christmas card season so I  wanted to take the "perfect family picture" on the beach. I shopped for coordinating outfits ahead of time. It took A LOT of shopping to find something in the same color scheme that would work for everyone. But I finally found the perfect outfits and even managed to bring all of it with us to California. But my next hurdle to the perfect family picture was the weather. It rained one day so no pictures. The next day was incredibly sunny. No pictures. By the third day I told my family to just put the clothes on and we'll take the pictures no matter what. Next hurdle: no matter how old you are the last thing you want to put on before heading out to the beach is anything other than a swimsuit. There was much weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth. By the time we got out to the beach it was windy and the light was all wrong. But there was no way I was going to get everyone to try it another day. So we did our best.

Did I end up getting the perfect family picture? You be the judge.

Umm....definitely not the "perfect family picture." Not even close. But the irony of the whole thing is that the same evening we were all walking on the pier and my sister snapped this picture of us.

It's certainly not color coordinated but it turned out to be the perfect family picture. It even made it onto the Christmas card.

Not picture perfect, but still perfectly us!

Five for Friday

I went to see the "The Help" last night with some friends. I loved it! I had already read the book so I was excited to see how the movie would turn out. I was not disappointed. I try to read books before seeing the movies based on those books. I don't like to read a book after seeing the movie because I don't get the chance to create my own images of characters and scenes in the story. In my humble opinion, movies don't always live up to the books. Some do, but most don't. "The Help" is one that did and I thouroughly enjoyed it. Here are 5 of my favorite movies that I love just as much as the books they were based on.

1. To Kill a Mockingbird

2. Of Mice and Men

3. Pride and Prejudice

4. Anne of Green Gables

5. Harry Potter

Thoughtful Thursday

My husband has turned me into a talk radio junkie. My favorite show these days is the Dave Ramsey show. I am reading his book, The Total Money Makeover. It is amazing. Even if you don't need any financial advice, (but who doesn't?) the book is so motivating in other areas. These quotes have been my favorites:

"Most people won't change until the pain of where they are exceeds the pain of change."

"The enemy of 'the best' is not 'the worst.' The enemy of 'the best' is 'just fine.'"

I am definitely guilty of accepting "just fine." It's true that sometimes it is easier to be mediocre. Making changes and trying for "the best" can be hard. I find that it is really easy to get complacent. I need to step back and force myself to honestly evaluate how I am doing in different areas of my life and not be content with "just fine." Because we all deserve the best.

Just something to think about on this thoughtful Thursday.

Wednesday: What's Happening?

PK received his Eagle Scout award in April. It was a great evening. We celebrated the fact that he finished something big. He has, unfortunately, not had the best track record when it comes to finishing things. So this was a major accomplishment for this boy! He has had some great scout leaders through the years and it was a neat opportunity for him to pay tribute to them as well.

Tuesday's Terrific Tip

With the start of school comes the daily deluge of paper. In my opinion, conquering paper clutter is the key to better organization. Like many homes, my kitchen is the hub of before-school and after-school activity. So the kitchen is where my paper system begins. I have this setup on one of the counters.

The left side holds file folders standing up. Each member of the family has a file folder. These folders hold papers that we need to refer to often. Carpool schedules, school calendars, projects in progress, scout calendars, any paper that you need to keep handy. The horizontal slots on the right are holding areas. The top slot is the active file. These are things that I need my husband to look at that day-- important mail, papers to review, sign, etc. The middle slot is a holding area for my husband. He can put his papers there and get to them when he is ready. The bottom slot is for papers that need to be scanned or filed.

After school, the kids are responsible to empty their backpacks and put their papers in a pile on the counter. Then I go through the pile. I pull out what needs to be saved-- flyers, calendars, etc, and file them in that child's individual folder. Papers that need to be signed and returned to school are signed right then and returned to the backpacks.  Then I put all of their completed work in their laundry room cubby. When that pile gets big (and when the child is NOT around) I go through the papers and save what is meaningful and throw the rest away. Art projects are hung on the wall for awile. Then I take a picture of them before they get filed or tossed.

To store cherished school papers, I have a plastic file box for each child with hanging folders for each grade. Items that are too big for the box get photographed and then tossed out. It sounds a little harsh but most of the time we display things for awhile and I find that I am more emotionally attached to these things than my children are. Many times I throw things out at the end of the school year. By that time the child is not as attached.

We have this setup in our laundry room. The binders and baskets on the top are for my husbands stuff. There is a basket for work papers, scout papers and personal papers. The top row of squares is for backpacks. The second row of squares is for school papers. The third row has a basket for each child. They keep whatever they want in these baskets. Swimming goggles in the summer, gloves in the winter, etc. It has been SO helpful to give each child a place to keep their "whatever."

Monday's Memory

The kids watched "The Aristocats" yesterday. It hasn't been seen at our house for several years. In fact, Mr. E had no idea what it was about. The olders told him that they used to watch it all the time and I think they were excited to watch it again. After watching the first few minutes of the movie, Mr. E exclaimed, "YOU GUYS used to watch THIS????!!!!" Yes, Mr. E, they did and if I hadn't have been there to witness it myself, I wouldn't have believed it etither. They watched it over and over and over. And I was pretty tired of listening to it.

But I will admit that I sang along while listening to it yesterday!

Here's my little Aristocats fans, PK, Miss A and PC

Thoughtful Thursday: Summer 2011

It was a good summer. Looking back it seemed pretty uneventful and yet there was still a lot going on. Mr. Whitty was in the middle of closing down his office. This was a big, big, bummer of a task and caused a lot of stress for both of us. It also caused a lot of penny pinching over the summer and only 1 quick family vacation over the 4th of July weekend. But the kids all ended up having a great time anyway. PK went to scout camp, the lake and several skate parks. PC went to scout camp, the lake, ice skating with friends, movies with friends, and swimming and swimming and swimming with friends. Miss A had 2 dream jobs this summer. The first was babysitting cousins on a houseboat at Lake Powell. The second was babysitting another set of cousins at a guest ranch in the mountains. She was in heaven. Mr. E spent lots of time playing and pool hopping with friends. He also was invited to movies, birthday parties and went to the lake for the first time. I guess I owe the parents of all of my children's friends a big THANK YOU for providing so much entertainment this summer.

And me, I spent some time on some organizing projects. I did a lot of reading. And I also spent a lot of time keeping the peace. Here are some of the things that I learned over the summer.

1. I am incredibly more motivated in June than I am in July. I am awesome in June! I keep the summer routine going strong with chores and projects and meals and games, etc. By the end of July you can find one child on the computer playing a game, one child on my laptop playing a game, one child on the Wii downstairs and another child watching TV upstairs. It really goes downhill from there. We get hot and cranky and just hang in there til school starts in August.

2. Having teenagers is a lot like having little kids. I found that even though 3 out of my 4 children are old enough to stay home alone, it was really hard for me to go anywhere. There was always the fight over who has to stay home with the youngest one. And there were about 20 calls to my on my cell phone as soon as I left the house. I'll admit that most of those calls were about who was fighting with who. I couldn't leave the house with a kitchen full of 13 year old boys "doing a little cooking". And I won't leave the 15 year old boys playing on the computer home alone either.

3. You can never have enough brownie mixes. (See reference above to the 13 year olds.)

4. When my two older boys were playing Words With Friends with each other on their ipods, I counted it as family together time. Even though they were in different rooms. I totally counted it.

5. Summer is a really hard time to pinch pennies. I think I will start a little summer savings fund for next year. Without older kids and no swimming pool, you really do run out of things to do.

6. A snowcone machine is worth its weight in gold.

7. Every year it is the same. At the beginning, I look forward to staying up late, sleeping in and kicking back and relaxing. By the end, I need the schedule and the routine. And every year, we marvel at how short summer seems to be!

Sixteen

A lot can happen in sixteen years.

And I am so very, very glad that it did.

Happy birthday PK!

Overnight

Growth spurts. The most dramatic growth spurt happens during a child's first year when they triple their birth weight and increase their lenght by 50%. After that, their growth rate evens out a bit, but they are still growing like crazy. Have you ever picked up your baby out of the crib in the morning and thought, "Wait a minute, you're bigger this morning than you were last night." I remember times when my children were little and they would spend a few days eating and eating and eating. And then one morning they would walk down the stairs and I would say, "Wait a minute, I could swear that you grew a few inches during the night."

But I'm finding that there is another dramatic growth spurt that happens between the ages of 12 and 16. It's called puberty. Ewww! Does the word bring back awkward memories of fifth grade health class? Puberty may have been awkward when you were going through it, but it's down right CRAZY to you watch your children go through it. Because I'm back to having those "Wait a minute" moments like I did when they were little. Only this time it's, "Wait a minute, your voice is deeper." Or "Wait a minute, didn't I just buy those pants that are now too short?" Or "Wait a minute, you have hair in your armpits."

Today I had another one of those "Wait a minute" moments. I was scanning through Facebook and saw some pictures of my son that were posted by some of his new friends from EFY.

>




Ok, Wait a minute, when did you start looking so handsome? When did you start looking so comfortable with your arm around a really cute girl? When did you grow up?

I could swear it happened overnight.

By the way, he did hang out with some realy great guys during the week, too.